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hand sanitizer

To fully understand this scented hand sanitizer, let’s begin with Sir Arthur Q. Stink of the British Isles, who issued a proclamation in 1768 which reads as follows: “To the Men, Women, Children and Families of Great Britain – It is my distinct pleasure today to introduce you and yours to an odor unlike anything […]

$14.99
wake and bake alarm clock

Start your day the right way with the Wake & Bake Dream Griddle Alarm Clock, by Darby McKingons. If you didn’t know, Darby McKingons is widely respected as the World Record holder for the “most calories eaten in a single day.” McKingons won this prestigious title in 1947 after consuming just over 139,084 calories. His […]

It’s the future, dude – nobody should have to stand when they can sit. Therefore; we formally announce the world’s greatest device: The Wearable Chair (as seen on Silicon Valley) That’s right – take a load off anytime, anywhere with the chair that literally changes everything for the better. Going to an outdoor concert? Forget […]

$1,069.99
the electric head massage helmet with app

You seem stressed out a little bit lately, is everything OK? Come on, why are you so anxious? Seems Like You May Need an Electric Head Massager… I mean, it’s not like we’re in the midst of a worldwide pandemic, right? That would be crazy, right?! The way you’re acting, you’d think the Pentagon released […]

$399.99
coloring book of Florida Man

If there was one state in the United States of America that matters, we can all agree that it’s Florida. As a matter of fact, Florida is the breeding ground for a superior type of human being that is now finally gaining the global attention they so rightfully deserve. Enter: the Florida Man. The Florida […]

how to cook chicken

You have a filthy mind, and we’re not even sure we’re going to continue with this product description until we make one thing clear. THIS BOOK IS NOT ABOUT WHAT YOU THINK IT’S ABOUT. You think you’re so sneaky. Clicking on the image, the link, whatever. Your mind is racing. “Oh, my! There’s a book […]

$14.16

Imagine if you could have a personal “hype-man” follow you around like you were a celebrity rapper. Somebody to follow you around all day every day just shouting about how great you are and giving you motivational quotes to keep you inspired. You wake up in the morning and hit the alarm… “Yo! My dude […]

$23.00
nailed it

If you still think the archaic “That Was Easy” button has any relevance in today’s world, you’ve got another thing coming, Mister (or Miss. Or Ms. Or Mrs. ). That thing you’ve got coming? The “NAILED IT” button. Designed in a micro laboratory in the heart of downtown Brooklyn, this is the absolute must-have button […]

$16.99

Meet Mister Chubbles, the cat that makes other cats look lazy. Have you ever heard of a cat that earns enough money to pay the mortgage on a nice, mid-sized starter home? How about a cat that is not only painstakingly precise when it comes to floor maintenance, but also has an incredible knack for […]

A Tent That Attaches to An SUV

Ditch the house, dude – it’s time to start camping like a champion. Sell the house, drop the mortgage, the electric bill, the gas bill, the water bill, the taxes. All that nonsense. We proudly present a better way to live: the 10’x10’ Backroadz SUV tent for Camping Like a Champion Let us tell you […]

$249.99
human hamster wheel

If there is one thing every child on earth can agree on, it’s the straight up fact that they all would prefer to be hamsters than human beings. Children from every state, country and continent, for thousands of years have watched hamsters with great envy. Here are just a few responses to a 1994 survey […]

$91.79
a funny nerd

The NERD SQUAD has officially blown open its doors and is welcoming new members who can fall in line with what it means to be the nerdiest of nerds. Fortunately, if you’re not quite prepared to join the NERD SQUAD, this all in one NERD KIT is going to get you almost all the way to the finish line.

This kit has everything you need to pull pranks, survive in the wilderness & more. Fuel can, matches, logs, fire pit. You’ll have it made. With a kit like this, you’ll have no problems with your first fire.

the best temporary tattoo printer

What’s the story behind the temporary tattoo printer anyways? Well, it all started like this… Date: Sunday, April 19th  Time: 3:13am Place: Carl’s Ink & Stink The customer walked through the door smelling of a mix of under carbonated light beer and dollar store cigarettes. They remarked “YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE, AND ME WANTS A […]

$289.00
Germ-Guards for Fingers

WHAT?! ARE YOU STILL TOUCHING STUFF WITHOUT FINGER COVERS LIKE SOME TWO BIT JABRONI FROM PLANET “I’M INSANE-A-TOPIA?!” You must be out of your barely functioning, rummage sale quality brain if you think touching door handles, ATM buttons or pretty much everything on planet Earth that isn’t the underbelly of a newborn kitten is safe. […]

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