Define Awesome

MEET SARGE, HOST OF COOL HIT NEW VIDEO GAME, EXTREME CHORES! SARGE IS GOING TO WALK YOU THROUGH WHAT IT TAKES TO BE AN ABSOLUTE BUTTOCKS KICKER IN THE WORLD OF CHORE LIFE, WHERE IT’S A TAKE NO PRISONERS LIFESTYLE FOLLOWED BY A TEN KNUCKLE SHUFFLE OF JABS TO...

Murder is a common theme in Game of Thrones. Just when you get attached or start sympathizing with a character…boom! They’ve been barbecued with wildfire or had their throat sliced end to end like a sacrificial goat. More than 30 characters died in the season six finale, and yet...

Let’s be real; fish are the easiest pet to take care of.  But sometimes, even throwing some food in their tank now and then can become a real hassle when you’re busy trying to take over the world.  Well, the robotic pet fish is the answer to your problem....

In the Autumn of 1916, a man named Barnaby J. Minkles stumbled upon a prank so lively, so wonderful and so outrageous, he was regarded as one of the foremost prank masters of the twentieth century. Minkles worked long hours on the assembly line as a linesman for the...

Never touch or pet your pets again! The Pet Petter is the perfect gift for the dog or cat lover. This automatic petting device has 4 different speeds

Take your upcoming party to the next level. Turn your cocktails into a specialty concoction with these dry ice drink stirrers.  Whether you use it for an unforgettable Instagram or making a drink to capture the eye of an onlooker,  you’re sure to impress with these. These stirring sticks are designed to...

It’s Raining. But, this time something is different. It feels right. It feels different. It’s like, magic or something. It’s the Hands-Free Umbrella. For the first time ever, you can have TWO FREE HANDS while it’s raining! But there are more benefits to it than just having two hands...

Have you ever tried to shrink an over-sized garment in the dryer and it came out looking like a sweater for a chihuahua? Or perhaps a favorite sweater ended up in there by mistake? We all mess up the wash every so often.  Or every day, but no judgment!...

Meet Dick (short for Richard). Richard is…well, he’s not one of those people you’d call your pal. Neither is he rich. Ironically, there really isn’t a better way to describe Mr. Richard than to apply the four-letter word his mama gave him at birth. It fits Mr. Richard well,...

Do you have a desire to pledge allegiance to the Zoltan? Have an obsession with popping bubble wrap? Or maybe you’ve always wanted to know what it feels like to be a fine china dish in the back of a moving truck? Enter: The Bubble Wrap Suit All of...

I know your grandma is rolling over in her grave.  All those times she told you to sit up straight in your chair, and now you’re paying the price for not listening.  Boy, was that a mistake.  But honestly, no one likes a person with bad posture. Learn not to be such...

Ladies and gentlemen, allow us to introduce the prank master general, Sir Edgar Toots and the story of his claim-to-fame with the toilet squirt gun prank. The legend of Edgar Toots is far and wide in this fair (and sometimes unfair) land.  If you aren’t familiar with the lore...

Love being awesome and letting the whole world know it? Then buckle up my magical friend, this unicorn is everything you’ve ever dreamed of all in one mythical and majestic inflatable. This beauty is your own personal floating island, comfortably seating your crew as everyone on land stares in...

Introducing: The 3d Edison LED Light Bulb Let’s go on a journey together into the mysteries of this 3d LED light bulb, shall we? A cosmic journey, where space and time are insignificant. Where nothing matters other than your deepest, innermost desires. You close your eyes. The lights of...

The Squatty Potty will ensure that you are #1 at doing #2. You’ve got that apple bottom, now make sure you treat it right!

Oh, the Poetic Irony Lord have mercy on us all, what foul creature hath thou wrought? Now, for a low low price, you can own the soul of a former banker, forever imprisoned in this hellish piggy bank. Frozen, save for a mouth that can open just wide enough...

MY NAME IS PRISON MIKE. THEY CALL ME PRISON MIKE BECAUSE I’VE BEEN IN PRISON. AND MY NAME IS MIKE. You think it’s all fancy dances and handshakes in prison? Because let me tell you, buddy, it’s not. It’s not waking up leisurely at quarter past eight while a...

Now you can balance your life-crippling soda addiction with a false sense of helping the environment! Don’t just throw that big plastic soda bottle away; use it as a high capacity water gun chamber. The Bazooka Water Gun holds more water (or tequila, if this is for a bachelor...

The Epic Fail Button – With An Epic Failure Trombone Sound (incase hearing someone say epic fail wasn’t enough) How often do you think to yourself in your head “well that was a fail?” Now you can actually show your disdain for the situation and make everyone else in...

Hello, my name is Chuck Norris, and I’m here to tell you about this fancy little book a good friend of mine named Ian Spector wrote called: “The Truth About Chuck Norris: 400 Facts About the World’s Greatest Human.” Now the first question you might be asking is, “Hey,...

We all do it. Fourteen times per day on average. Some of us hide it, some of us own it, and some of us blame it on the dog. Of course, we are talking about farts! Whether it’s the smelly kind, the machine gun kind, the silent but deadly...

It’s 2am. You’ve been out all night doing the things you do to keep your life interesting (you know, drinking liquids that inebriate and such). Standing in your kitchen, you think to yourself, “What in the name of all that is Snoop Doggy Dogg am I going to satiate...

A Regular Ballpoint Pen? That’s not Going to Cut it, My Friend. You are prepared for the zombie apocalypse, right? Right?? Of course, you are you forward-thinking genius. You are a tactical self-defense master. Your bunker is all stocked up; your go-bag is ready under your desk at work,...

Have you ever woken out of bed thinking of breakfast? It’s a boring thought. That’s why The Mr. Sneezy egg separator is what your awkward mornings have been looking for; a conversation piece! Worried you might be late for work? Well, this egg separator is guaranteed to turn any...

You know you’ve reached true adulthood when you get excited about new accessories for your laundry room. Nothing gets you happier than a new fresh linen-scented fabric softener that was fifty-percent off. Until you get the Laundry Lasso, that is. Alliterative and boundlessly useful, the Laundry Lasso is a...