Oh goodness gracious, the humanity!
The odor emanating from the human being across from you is horrendous. Awful. Outrageous. You really need a shower.
You know the scent. It smells like a mixture of fermented jerky and a public restroom.
How did it happen? Why does the person smell so bad? And, oh no. DO YOU SMELL LIKE THAT TOO?
The fine art of enthralling showering, bathing and presenting a wonderous, clean smell is one that can be lost quickly.
Let’s look at what happened with your friend. The one across from you. The one who walked past you once and the wind they left behind made you nearly faint like it was a tent revival in the 1980’s on a hot July morning.
They woke up. They thought to themselves, “You know, what? I don’t think I want to jump in the shower today. It’s always so cold. The water is spotty. It’s just no fun anymore. I can go without a shower for one day, right?”
So they left the house. They walked outside, and started to sweat.
Not just a little sweat either. We’re talking ran a mile on the sun after doing push-ups on a mountain sweat. The kind of sweat that you lift your arm for a second and the insects buzzing around you all faint in horror.
Then they got in their car. Guess what? The air conditioning is broken. So they sweat more.
Now they have to go to some sort of networking event where everyone will soon, like you, come to realize the funk of 40,000 years wafting from their disgusting, wet, smelly body.
Don’t be this person. Be ready for the day. Be Captain Clean.
Being Captain Clean is easy. All you have to do is buy this beauty of a showerhead. The Methven Aio Handheld Showerhead with adjustable Arm Mount. “COULD IT GET ANY BETTER?,” you may ponder.
Hell yes, it can.
This baby comes in chrome, so it’s also super sleek and nice to look at.
Here are some of the reasons, aside from avoiding being a stink monster, that you might want to consider buying this gorgeous piece of hardware:
- It won’t judge you while you’re naked in the shower.
- It has a super consistent, efficient and comfortable flow of water.
- The water coverage is adjustable, without losing any water pressure.
- No metal! That means no bad stuff. It’s made of Aerospace Polymers that are the best of the best.
- Lifetime Warranty: it’s good as long as you live. Which may be forever, if you stay clean enough.
Be Captain Clean, not the Stink Monster.
With this baby, your next shower will change your life, all thanks to the Methven Aio Handheld Showerhead with adjustable Arm Mount.
Imagine yourself, bathing in pure awesome.
Every time you shower under this awesome water jet, these words will empower you: luxury, posh, premium, comforting, fresh, bodacious.
Those words describe everything you are with this showerhead. Its quality is, much like yours, unsurpassed.
Say no to gross. Say yes to the best. Say yes to your shower.
“Ever since I said yes to the Aurajet Showerhead, I just couldn’t stop saying yes to everything. Next thing I knew, people just started calling me the Yes Man. This showerhead has truly changed my life for the better”
-Jim Carrey