You say, fine sir, is that a cigar whiskey glass you hold in those powerful hands of yours? You’re a mighty fancy gentleman, aren’t you?!
Wonderful! What a wonderful existence it must be!
You spend your mornings in a luxurious bathrobe, likely being given a world-class massage by a masseuse with a name like “Olfan” or “Laurencia.”
You have a lovely breakfast of freshly cut cantaloupe, artisan toast with endangered bee honey and tea from some area of the Himalayas that is regarded as the most exquisite in the world.
Oh, you’re a fancy gentleman, aren’t you?!
Afternoons are filled with sightseeing (typically done in a classic automobile). People stop and stare at the luxury that is before them when you appear.
Gosh, you are one incredible human being.
Are you the greatest of all the Universe’s creation? That may, in fact, be hard to disagree with.
Your daily vocabulary includes copious use of boujee words like:
- Class
- Deluxe
- Best
- Finest
- Elite
- Superior
- Supreme
You, Sir, are in the Top 1% of the Top 1%.
But there is a snafu in the ultra-luxe exterior that is your life.
Evening comes. You plan on enjoying a glass of Glenavon Special Liqueur Whisky 1851 from your collection.
The bottle was only $30,000, a half-days work – so you consider this finely aged drink one of your more “peasant” choices.
In any case, you have one of your servants go and fetch the bottle.
You have another servant fetch your Mayan Sicar. A half a million-dollar vintage cigar that you believe is approximately 600 years old, sourced from a small town in Guatemala.
As the servants rush to attend to your needs, you realize the horror that is the current moment.
“MUST I ENJOY MY CIGAR AND WHISKEY IN SEPARATE HANDS?”
You think. You stew. Now you’re frustrated.
“AM I SOME SORT OF MONKEY MAN?! WHY MUST I RESORT TO USING BOTH MY HANDS FOR SUCH DAILY RITUAL?”
Then it hits you.
There is but one glass. One glass that can hold both your finely aged whiskey and hand-rolled cigar. A Cigar Whiskey Glass.
But does it exist? IT DOES NOT…YET!
You perk up.
You call your servants to call your friend who works in the glass industry. You explain your needs.
He makes the glass.
He delivers the glass in less than one hour.
You test out this wonderful apparatus that holds both your whiskey and has a grooved area for your cigar.
SUCCESS!
Everything you’ve ever needed for your evening vices has been delivered to you.
Your servants smile and wipe the sweat from their brow.
They will live to see another day, with you, in paradise.
You Grab Your Cigar Whiskey Glass
You sit back and look up at the clouds.
You think to yourself, “My good man, you’ve done it again.”
The masseuse rushes out to massage your feet.
A sigh of relief comes over you, as you settle into all that is yours.
“Olfan,” you say, “Don’t forget to really work the big toe. I worked hard today.”
The greatest glass in human history can be yours. The Cigar Whiskey glass, that has a built-in cigar notch. Luxury living at it’s finest.
