When Earth was created, there was very little to do.
1. Dinosaurs were roaming everywhere, swingin’ their tails all over the place like it was some sort of giant zoo meets gladiator battle (but in this case the dinosaurs were both the animals and the gladiators).
2. There was an Ice Age, and if what we’ve seen in the movie Ice Age is factual, a squirrel caused that whole mess.
3. Vikings were a thing at some point? Maybe Greeks too?
4. Something called the “Old West” existed, we think. We’re not 100% sure what it was, or if it actually happened. If it did, it was probably pretty dusty and there was a lot of liquor being drunk?
When fried chicken was invented, the world and all its inhabitants reached peak civilization awesomeness.
Every human being held hands and finally rejoiced, got along and agreed in unison that fried chicken was, in fact, the greatest and most exciting thing to ever happen in history. Ever.
Fried chicken is the type of food that unites nations and makes the world seem like a brighter, friendlier place.
Check out these words you could (and probably do) use to describe fried chicken:
- Delicious
- Incredible
- Amazing
- Crispy
- Juicy
- Tender
- Hot
- Crunchy
- Mouth-watering
- Apetizing
- Tasty
- Flavorsome
- Flavorful
- Delectable
- Palatable
- Succulent
- Luscious
- Rich
- Savory
- Piquant
- Scrumptious
- On-point
- Delish
- Yummy
Now you know we mean business!
Since you can’t physically consume fried chicken in your sleep (we’ve field tested several times with no luck), we’ve found the next best thing:
a fried chicken pillow.
This little beauty not only makes a perfect decor statement.
(that statement being: “FRIED CHICKEN RULEZ, ALL OTHER THINGS DROOL”), but also could be used as a prop.
Imagine the hilarity that would ensue if you pretended to eat this stuffed fried chicken pillow.
Hella funny.
We made sure to underline “pretended” because this fried chicken pillow looks so good you might just want to eat it. Warning: Don’t.
It tastes nothing like fried chicken. Not like we know, or anything.
OK, we know. It’s filled with stuffing. And not the kind of stuffing that’s edible. Oops.
Almost two feet long and absolutely flawless, if you love fried chicken, this fried chicken pillow is the item for you.
If you don’t like fried chicken, we have to ask...are you even a human, bro?
Our favorite Amazon review of the Fried Chicken Pillow:
