2019 – What a time to be alive!
It would easy to joke about Qoobo, a pillow with a wagging tail designed to help comfort people who, for whatever reason, can’t have a pet.
But we’re nice, so… We’re not going to do it.
We’re simply going to tell you how this wonderful, soft, robot pillow, which simulates an animal was invented.
Yes, any animal.
More like a cat though.
This therapeutic robot pillow is complete with a moving tail (powered by an easy to use rechargeable battery system) and surprisingly soft fur.
Several years ago, on the planet X17, an alien named Hankypoo was lonely.
Hankypoo was a cool alien.
Sure, he was a little bit older, but he hadn’t lost a step.
Hank was still handsome, funny, engaged in all of the things outer space life offers.
You might be asking yourself, “Wait. What does living on X17 with aliens offer?” Glad you asked.
Here are some of the highlights of living on the outer reaches of the universe:
Instead, the entire planet is lit up by wonderfully festive holiday lights which means people are in a good mood all the time – and ready to party.
Let’s just say there are margaritas everywhere pretty much all the time.
Aliens can easily time travel, which is super helpful for when they want to show their alien kids what it was like to really live with dinosaurs, meet an angel or high five Garsh, the ruler of the eighth dimension in the year 5689.
The odors are divine.
Scents like lilac, bacon or fresh-cut grass are available at a moments notice thanks to the invention of the Whiz-Bang-Smell-O-Vator that is given free to every alien.
It’s very nice not to smell bad things (like an exploding black hole if you know what we mean).
Sounds pretty righteous, yes? Notice anything, not on the list?
If you can believe it, pets don’t exist in space. Crazy, right?!
Poor Hank had everything any friendly little alien could ever want…except for a pet.
Hank became a little lonely in his old age.
And guess what?
His little grandalien Marlapoo also was a bit sad because she didn’t like sleeping alone in the cold, dark, limitless space.
Hank had an idea.
“EARTH!” he thought to himself. He arrived.
Hank saw wonderous, domesticated animals that made so many people happy.
Animals like goldfish, hamsters, dogs – and the holy grail of household friends…cats!
Unfortunately, it became clear after some trial and error that cats cannot live in outer space (we won’t get into the details, but Fluffy, thank you for your service).
Hank took to making a blueprint for such an animal.
The moving tail.
“Oh, this will be glorious!” he remarked.
Several days later, it was born. Qooba. The therapeutic robot cat pillow with a tail.
It responded in a lifelike way to Hank petting it.
It was comforting, warm, and the perfect solution to his loneliness.
Hank took Qooba to his grandalien MarlaPoo.
MarlaPoo instantly had a connection with the little furball/wannabe cat.
Happiness had invaded outer space with cat pillows!
Now, in a marvel of modern times, Qooba cat pillow is available to you.
We present, your new best friend: Qooba.
“I’ve finally found someone who doesn’t turn the tv off when they see me in a movie. My new cat, which I’ve named ‘lil Nicky is truly the best thing that’s ever happened to me. It loves me, sits with me, doesn’t run away, and even purrs when I come on TV!”