Listen up chubs, chocolate isn’t just for breakfast anymore.
Now you can have it before breakfast, too.
Hot damn! Are you still dreaming?
Nope, this is as real as it gets.
Besides, if you were dreaming, could you fly? Probably, right?
Go ahead, try to fly. Right now. Concentrate.
Did you do it? No, you didn’t.
It’s natural, it freshens, it whitens…and IT’S FRIGGIN CHOCOLATE FLAVORED.
- BILLS IN THE MAIL: Sure, the electric bill is like a hundred bucks more than you have right now, so you won’t be paying that thing on time - but guess what? THE ENVELOPE IS MADE OUT OF CHOCOLATE. Go ahead, eat your bills away.
- EXERCISE: Need to do a handful of pull-ups? NO PROB - because every time that cute little chin of yours clears the pull-up bar, there’s a chocolate bar dangling from the ceiling just waiting for you to take a nibble. JACKPOT!
- WORK SUCKS: Chocolate doesn’t. That’s why you’d definitely love work way more if your e-mail was made of chocolate and all you had to do was give the keyboard a bite...instead of having to pretend you never got the email in the first place (as to, you know, avoid any actual work).
Since you’re a skeptic, you might be asking yourself, “BUT CAN CHOCOLATE TOOTHPASTE ACTUALLY BE GOOD FOR MY TEETH?!?!”
Oh, it can. It can and it is. (Shout out to Dr. Sheffield!)
Chocolate toothpaste puts the fun back in fundamental oral care.
Why do you think so many people brag about “waking and baking.” It’s because all anyone wants to do is wake-up and immediately start baking chocolate goodies.
Right? Yes.
Chocolate toothpaste is the answer to your sweet tooth – literally.
Not only will your teeth look better, feel better and be happy – after one taste of Dr. Sheffield’s Natural Chocolate Toothpaste.
But you’ll be treating your toothbrush like a microphone and singing your heart out to “Chocolate Rock” – which is a song you’ll make up the lyrics to.
Let’s just say the lyrics should be something like “Hey, chocolate rocks…and now my teeth are clean…yeah, yeah, yeah!”
Thank you, Dr. Sheffield & Company.