Time to make that bag of bones feel like a million damn dollars, buddy!
Male, female or anything in between, right, left, up or down – you’re a diva. You deserve the best, and only the finest in premium luxury will do.
Well, strap in and hang on, because the Radiant Personal Sauna is going to make you feel like the grand champion of winning.
It’s the ultimate personal, portable sauna with all the bells and whistles.
Well, not actually bells and whistles, it’s got a whole bunch of way better features:
Imagine you’ve had a hard day on the farm. Or in the office. Or at the gym. Or waiting tables.
Whatever it is you do that takes it out of you…the personal sauna will make it all better.
Your body screams out, “YOU’RE FINALLY TREATING ME THE RIGHT WAY!”
The personal sauna even has convenient spots to put out your arms and scroll through your phone (maybe even scrolling through baller status websites like DefineAwesome.com).
Your body will be surrounded by heat.
Not too hot (come on, you don’t want to be on the sun again, right? That first trip to the sun you had was crazy).
The personal sauna will straight up rejuvenate every pore of your body, leaving you to feel like the best human being you can be, and not like a heap of week-old deli meat from the corner grocery store (which is probably how you’ve been feeling a little bit lately).
WHAT MORE COULD YOU WANT? We’ll suggest:
You deserve it all, and the ultimate in luxury is here.
Don’t be in your home after a long day and sit in an old chair…or worse, your bed. Ugh. That’s not going to do anything but put you to sleep.
How about instead…a party for your body, relaxation style.
Here are some big-name celebrities who personally vouch for the benefits of this very specific personal sauna:
“I ain’t kinda hot, I’m sauna. I sweat money and the bank is my shower” –Little Wayne
“To sweat is to pray, to make a true offering of your hottest, most innermost self. Sweat from the pores is sweet, tasty water, like liquid that releases your alcohol over-intake. Sweat is a superior, ancient and universal form of releasing toxins you purposely put into yourself. The personal sauna has changed my life. The more I sweat, the hotter I look. The hotter I look, the closer I come to pure joy.” –Angelina Jolie.
“Every night, I walk until midnight into a storm, then I go home and take a personal sauna for three hours. It clears my mind. I listen to my heart and see the signs of my destiny in the sky.” –Jennifer Aniston.
“Personal Sauna? Yes. Me likey.” George Clooney
“When I’m acting in front of a camera and using a lot of sweet bodily motion, I guess in its own way; it’s a pretty hot act. I really enjoy doing it. But there’s something that I enjoy more, and reminds me of me because it’s very hot: my personal sauna. You know what I mean, jellybean?” –Brad Pitt
Be like these good looking, famous people. It’s time to pamper yourself a time or two and see what it’s like to be like them.
It has everything you need:
Take care of yourself in the way you deserve: ultimate luxury, baby!
It’s so good, and your friends might even pay you to let them use it. BOOM – highly profitable side business. Wow, this thing does it all!