Talking Toilet Paper Holder

Cut the crap, web surfer. We’re about to introduce you to the man who is going to change your life.

A man who is so legendary, that you should bow down before him.

The king of pranks.

The prince of hilarity.

The jester of good times.

Ladies and gentleman, boys and squirrels, children of all ages…we proudly present to you:

Talking Toilet Paper Holder 1

Mr. T.P. Roll.

T.P. Roll gives zero number twos about being awesome.

He just is awesome, at all times.

He just is. Want to know why?

Because he is the inventor of the toilet paper roll that records audio.

Talking Toilet Paper Holder 2

What an ingenious item. T.P. Roll is basically the Albert Einstein & Shakespeare fusion of the toilet paper game. He knows how important it is to be funny when you have a guest who is on the pot, and also knows laughter is the best medicine when it comes to dropping a number two.

Talking Toilet Paper Holder 3

T.P. Roll was bored of the same old same old. People used his bathroom. They did their business. They exited.

That’s pretty lame. He came up with a way to amp up the bathroom experience.

He created a recordable toilet paper roll, so that each time the toilet paper rolls around, there is a recording that plays, sending the person on the toilet into a fit of laughter. Check out the classic T.P. Roll lines he’d record into the device:

“Oh, my! It appears you have just decided to produce a #2! Well in my book, you’re still #1!”

“It smells like the remains of the day in this piece!”

“I would guess someone has decided on an all-asparagus diet!”

“The person in line for the bathroom is going to think you’re the absolute worst!”

“Am I feeling silly, or does it smell like Taco Tuesday exploded in here?”

“I’m going to send a text to everyone at this party to cover their noses, hombre.”

“If this were an amusement park, your two cheeks would have caused a code red.”

“I’m dying to know: Is it killing you like it’s killing me?”

“I can’t escape. Please, help me.”

“May the force be with you.”

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“You ought to be ashamed of yourself.”

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The talking toilet paper roll:

Compliments of Mr. T.P. Roll allows you to give your personal spin on the wonderful recording ideas he left when he first invented this beautiful device.

Now it’s your turn.

Simply record and wait for the laughter from the poor bastard on the john.

T.P. Roll knew it was more important than ever, in his time, to make people laugh while they were doing their business.

Now, you can continue his legacy by amping up the party with your signature touch.

All you need to add is a couple of AAA Batteries and a personalized touch of your jokes to turn your next bathroom visitors into the next participant in the “Who wants to be a super funny bathroom user.”

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Bravo, Mr. T.P. Roll, you got it. We thank you for your service.

This talking toilet paper holder will quickly become the conversation piece of any household.

Now, because of Mr. T.P. Roll, if you ever want some company or just a friend to talk to, you can turn an average trip to the bathroom into a creepy, yet laughing matter.

Do you ever get lonely during your long hours on the toilet?

Record customized audio messages for you and your guests to hear any time they go to grab some teepee on the porcelain pedestal. 

The device plays your personalized recording any time the toilet paper roll turns, giving a pleasant surprise to any unexpecting visitor.

So, when would you ever need a talking product like this?

  • Halloween, record a scary message for your guests to be spooked. 
  • Christmas, wish your guests a season greeting.
  • Potty training your kids, remind them to wash their hands and flush.

Give your guests a friendly greeting, no matter the occasion, every time they visit your porcelain throne!