Random

2019 – What a time to be alive! It would easy to joke about Qoobo, a pillow with a wagging tail designed to help comfort people who, for whatever reason, can’t have a pet. But we’re nice, so… We’re not going to do it. We’re simply going to tell...
funny poop emoji shaped cake
Getting angry is easy, but getting even instead of angry is hands-down the best option, always, in every situation. Let’s say your ex may have broken up with you on your birthday because, well, you thought that they were just cold-hearted meanies. Well, are you ready for the truth?...
$12.99
You’ve got all the riches, and the world knows it. You’re surrounded by wealth, luxury, and all the things the world envies. So how do you ensure you keep all the things you have worked so hard in this life untouched by the mass of humanity that wants nothing...
$10.99
cell phone jail for iphones and android phones
The Cell Phone Jail: The world’s smallest jail cell for your overzealous cell phone usage is not quite what it seems. Imagine the jungles of Africa, 1981. Hot, dry, unexplored. American traveler Saxon Bingham enters the jungle alone. He discovers a tiny jail cell, empty in the middle of...
$10.89
Kids love to climb all over sore backs, but with this travel gear carrying around your baby is effortless. Are you a traveling parent? This piggyback rider is a must have to add to your backpacking gear collection. Become the next internet sensation with your cutie riding on your...
Oh, look who it is, Johnny Moneybags. Walking around town like he owns the damn place. Do you smell that? What is that odor? No, it’s not his armpits…. It’s the hot new cologne “Eau De New money.”  The stench is beautifully overwhelming. But, how did Johnny Moneybags get...
beer slushy maker
Enjoy your favorite cold brew in a whole new way. A Beer Slushy Way. Keep your coolness factor of drinking a beer intact while still enjoying the refreshing frozen aspect of a margarita.  With this beer slushy maker, you can serve your brewski soft-serve style. No need to degrade your manhood...
$49.99
bazooka water gun super soaker
Now you can balance your life-crippling soda addiction with a false sense of helping the environment! Don’t just throw that big plastic soda bottle away; use it as a high capacity water gun chamber. The Bazooka Water Gun holds more water (or tequila, if this is for a bachelor...
$13.49
Do you wonder what the person you like is doing in their room? There is no need to wonder anymore when you can stuff this YI camera into any teddy bear. You can see it all, watch the person wake up, get dressed, pick their nose, and dream away...
$57.99
the cigar glass
Oh, you’re a fancy gentleman, aren’t you?! Wonderful! What a wonderful existence it must be! You spend your mornings in a luxurious bathrobe, likely being given a world-class massage by a masseuse with a name like “Olfan” or “Laurencia.” You have a lovely breakfast of freshly cut cantaloupe, artisan...
$24.95
YUM sauce
This is it, Morty! This is what the whole thing has been about Morty! My whole character arc. Every crazy caper. Every near-death experience. Mcdonald’s Szechuan sauce Morty! We searched the entire universe for these sweet little individually packaged sauces Morty, and here they were the whole time, right...
$39.98
The Epic Fail Button – With An Epic Failure Trombone Sound (incase hearing someone say epic fail wasn’t enough) How often do you think to yourself in your head “well that was a fail?” Now you can actually show your disdain for the situation and make everyone else in...
$14.99
disposable subtle butt
Picture this: You’re in a meeting, going on hour two. You had Mexican for lunch, which probably wasn’t the best idea looking back at it now. You’re sitting next to the new guy, and you can’t have him judging you for letting one loose, or two, and him commenting...
$12.95
electric hover shoes for adults
Look around. Right now. Look at what’s around you. Items. What’s exciting about that? Not much. Not much joy is derived from that picture on the wall. The seat you’re in. That piece of furniture over in the corner. Oh, and look at all that reading material over there....
$472.49
gun for self-defense
Have you ever really wanted to add salt to a wound literally, well this is pepper spray but isn’t that close enough? Because now with this SALT defense kit, it’s pretty much a done deal. When it comes to self-defense it beats out all other non-lethal methods of intimidation,...
$349.99
There is someone in your life who needs to be pranked. You know it, we know it, everybody knows it. But, how can you ensure maximum prank level action? Sure, you could do the old stand-bys: A whoopee cushion. A bucket of water on the top of a door....
two person double nester hammock
Float among the trees in this double nester hammock. We understand the desire to reconnect with nature. The earth is full of electric charge that our bodies evolved alongside with since the caveman days. But sleeping like a caveman on the hard rocky ground with bugs swarming around you...
CALLING ALL PARTY ANIMALS! OK, the party animals are here! Look at you crazy party animals! Horses, sheep, pigs, cows! Wild and crazy party animals who just love having a good time, don’t they! Now do us a favor. Get out. You, get out of here. Every single last...
$115.00
talking-chucky-doll
The talking Chucky doll is hands-down the perfect gift for any fan who has been looking to add to their horror movie memorabilia collection.  Or anyone who enjoys deadly dolls in their home.  Based on the original 1988 horror movies, you can own this terrifying little doll of the leading...
$69.99
best gifts in 2018 for your friends
We all like to think we know our friends pretty well. We might boast that we know their birthday or their favorite color, what sports teams they like and what they do for fun. But when it comes down to buying a gift for a friend, we often stop cold,...
For The First Time Ever, You Can Stare at a screen longer without worrying about the blue light causing headaches! Remember the future of the past? People were all going to be interconnected with gadgets and computers and screens… Everything was going to be all sleek and, like, super...
$41.08
center table cooler for drinks
Have you been looking for something to take your parties to the next level? Something that has everything you need in one place? Something that will make your friends overwhelmingly jealous? This coffee table and drink cooler combo can offer all of that and more, including a glimpse into...
$1299.00
Even children are smart enough to know that robots are taking over the world. Between artificial intelligence, voice-activated everything and the future landscape of employment basically being taken over by lines of code, where can we turn for comfort? Who could possibly help our kids in such uncertain times?...
$24.70
airtight zipped bag
Picture this: you’re out on the boat, it’s a beautiful day, and there’s a light breeze. Suddenly, the wind picks up, dark clouds gather, and it starts to pour. Normally, you’d freak out and throw your bags into the hold to protect them from the rain. But, with a...
$299.99
It’s Another Friday Night… …and you’re working the late shift at McDonald’s. Your feet are starting to ache, your head is starting to pound as the smell of french fries overwhelms your senses. And then you remember. In your locker in the back room, you have something that can...
It’s 2am. You’ve been out all night doing the things you do to keep your life interesting (you know, drinking liquids that inebriate and such). Standing in your kitchen, you think to yourself, “What in the name of all that is Snoop Doggy Dogg am I going to satiate...
$16.48
baby mop body suit
It was said that the only thing babies could do is eat, cry, sleep, & poop. It may be cute but let’s face it, babies haven’t been known to clean messes…. until now. We understand the concept of you don’t work; you don’t eat. Now babies can apply this...
$29.99
It is time to become Katy Perry in your new cloud-pool water floaty. How will you accessorize while floating in a cloud over the water at Miami Beach? Maybe a purple wig is in order, and don’t forget about the ice cream cone boobs. Women and men from all...
$42.99
keep condiments safe with the car condiment holder
It’s time to take the plunge. It’s time to get yourself an in-car sauce holder. Let’s be honest; your body is too far gone to have any real hope of getting back in shape. You’re never going to be the fittest person on the planet, and you’ll be damned...
nike-pocket-shoes
The Fanny Pack Sandals Are The Coolest Things Ever. Here’s Why: Want the ease of a fanny pack without the inconvenience of a strap on muffin top? No worries, these sandals have you covered.  Walk around hands-free in these fanny pack sandals by Nike.   These sandals will have you...
$31.93
The most successful human being that ever lived mastered two things: dreams and emotions. Who was this person of mystery? Her name was Alicia. Alicia lived in a little place you’ve probably never heard of before called New York City, New York (in the United States of America, which...
$47.99
fruit-flavored-cup
Keep yourself uber hydrated with this brain tricking flavored cup. Because who still drinks ordinary water anymore? Since when did water become fancy? That colorless, flavorless liquid we all need to live. People are paying $$$ for big brands like Perrier and La Croix. It’s like all anyone ever...
$29.95
funny animal fridge magnets
Do you like strong magnets and you cannot lie? What about animal butts? Yes? Well, then these dog butt animal fridge magnets are perfect for you, you little weirdo. Most kitchens house traditional fridge magnets, like a free one from a local pizza restaurant and an “I <3 NY”...
$10.00
realistic animal face mask
Unleash Your Inner Animal, On Your Face. Realistic animal masks aren’t just for zoo workers trying to get pandas riled up for mating season anymore! Now, for the first time ever, you too can unleash the animal inside while staying cool, comfortable, and covered from neck to noggin. Just...
$15.99
customize toilet with vinyl decals
Wake up in the morning. Brew coffee. Drink coffee. Time for a poo break! Take a seat on that plain, white porcelain bowl while you do your business (scrolling Instagram for thirst traps until your legs go numb). Ugh. The morning routine is so monotonous and boring. If only...
It’s Raining. But, this time something is different. It feels right. It feels different. It’s like, magic or something. It’s the Hands-Free Umbrella. For the first time ever, you can have TWO FREE HANDS while it’s raining! But there are more benefits to it than just having two hands...
$13.99
Sure, Kim Jong-Un has generally been referred to as a “dictator.” OK, maybe he is not the nicest guy in the world, we get it. The potential that he’s awesome and just wants to hang out and boom, you’ve got a new best friend.
$34.95
alternative method for dog drying
There’s a new way to keep your puppy fluffy. Wondering how everyone else keeps their puppy so cute and fluffy? Thanks to the advanced technology of air power, your furry little love ball of fluff can now experience a spa, in a wind-tunnel. Ever wanted to take your dog...
$49.95
“Oh, Mimi – could you fetch me another hors devours please?” “Ah, yes, Furball, I fancy a dessert to satisfy my naughty sweet tooth, my dear!” That could be you. That could be you speaking to your pets as you finally come to the realization that not only can...
prank mail packages
Time to kick up your embarrassing mail prank game a notch, compliments of the United States Postal Service. Let’s say, in theory, you’ve got a friend who needs to be put in their place. Imagine a world where you’d be able to send them a fraudulent gift right to...
$12.99
Let us take a moment to tell you the story of Johnny “Reverse” Peephole. You may know Johnny for his wonderful invention: The reverse peephole But, do you know how the ingenious invention came to be? Indulge us for a moment as we take you through a brief, but...
$33.42
If you’ve ever received a gift that you were less-than-thrilled about and wanted to re-gift, you’re not alone. And it’s not just the giving part, it’s receiving too. In fact, one survey suggests that an overwhelming majority of people – 83 percent – are completely comfortable receiving a re-gifted...
It’s 11:27 am. You wake up in your hastily hung hammock in your bedroom with a Mad Magazine on your lap. Your eyes pop open but your vision is somewhat blurry from the night before. You quickly crinkle aside the magazine to reveal your still in the same clothes...
$19.99
video recording doorbell camera for homes
It’s common knowledge that people hate talking to each other, especially when it comes to encounters with strangers.  So when some unexpected person comes to ring your doorbell, you know it’s troubling. The internal battle you’re having. Braving your fears and answering the door to potentially be solicited by...
$199.00
best gifts for women
Do you have trouble finding the perfect gift for the special woman in your life? Whether she’s picky or already seems to have everything she wants, there are innovative gift ideas to make her heart skip a beat. And the internet has made shopping for one-of-a-kind gifts easier than...
It’s Time. Time To Be Cool. Time To Play Capture The Flag! The cool kids in every single 1980’s movie had a few things in common: Awesome hair. Each follicle probably drenched to the tippy top with Aqua Net hairspray. That was the coolest way to make your hair...
$53.91
Meet Bill the Bull, the inflatable pool bull. Sure, that’s not his official name, but he is a bull without a doubt. This bull has been given the name Bill for a few reasons: Bill is a super sweet name that reminds us of a John Wayne era man’s...
$46.49
Oh goodness gracious, the humanity! The odor emanating from the human being across from you is horrendous. Awful. Outrageous. You really need a shower. You know the scent. It smells like a mixture of fermented jerky and a public restroom. How did it happen? Why does the person smell...
$99.33
Make fire a part of you. Well, your arm at least. Take hold of one of the greatest, most powerful elements in the palm of your wrist, and unleash your wrath upon: Hot dogs Burgers Steak That bee that’s just waiting for the right moment, but first wants to...
$149.95
8 ball that is sarcastic and funny
Let’s be real. there are very few things in this world that you can shake and instantly receive an answer from. Honestly, has your brain ever even considered something like that? Sad. Sad that we even had to bring this to your attention. But in sadness, there is hope....
$17.00
Attention Citizens, We Repeat, Attention Great Citizens! We have an alert for an unusual sighting in the residential area you are currently residing in. There have been reports of a lion in your neighborhood. We repeat, there have been reports of a lion in the neighborhood....
$11.58
Who is the life of the party? Is it the guy who brings all the beer, or the guy that cleans up the beer while dancing in his new house party mop shoes? What if I told you, you could be both those guys? You can be anything you...
$12.00
blah, blah, blah talking push button
Have a friend who doesn’t know when to stop sharing the details of their weekend? Or maybe you’re a teacher and are tired of your students’ endless excuses. Life is too short to put up with this nonsense, and you need to take matters into your own hands. Ever...
$10.99
MyCozyCups I Before E Weird Mug is perfect to sip your tea in front of your English teacher, your always right grammar police friends, or that kid that throws out novelty sayings for no reason or relevance. The I before E weird mug is like drinking your comeback and...
Oh, the Poetic Irony Lord have mercy on us all, what foul creature hath thou wrought? Now, for a low low price, you can own the soul of a former banker, forever imprisoned in this hellish piggy bank. Frozen, save for a mouth that can open just wide enough...
$14.99
Sure, you know your three-month-old is a gentleman and a scholar, but does he look the part? Nothing degrades an academic’s sterling reputation faster than a full-diaper, spit-up stained onesie, and inability to grow facial hair. Fortunately, there’s a simple way to cover up your baby’s faults and transform them into the Rhodes...
Hands-free phone viewing
Do you suffer from Millennial Elbow? It is often diagnosed by pain and stiffness in the elbow as a result of holding your phone in front of your face for hours at a time. While anyone can fall prey to this crippling condition, its victims are typically media-obsessed millennials...
Rainbow Unicorn Head is the only way to enter a party, everything else you heard about being fashionably late or how cool it is to not dress in theme, is dead wrong. Rainbow Unicorn Head says, “I am here to party, dance, and f#%& s%$# up, not talk to...
$49.95
cash money gun
The Rainmaker. The Awesome Cash Shooting, Gold Plated Electronic Gun. Let’s face it: you don’t get the respect you deserve. Sure, people think you’re super attractive, funny, powerful, charismatic and pretty much a flawless human being. You have a great smile, impeccable style and an air of confidence that...
$69.99
can-of-whoop-ass
A Can of Whoop-A**, You Ask? Who needs yet another cumbersome can of whoop-a**? You, that’s who, because this is no ordinary can of whoop-a**! Allow us to paint a picture for you. You’re out on the town, strutting your stuff, and you come across one of your many...
public toilet survival kit
There are innumerable scary, horrific places on the planet. Abandoned prisons. Long lost asylums. Haunted houses. Though nothing is scarier than a place we have all come into contact with in our lives – a place so terrifying, so nightmare-inducing, so unspeakably grotesque that it’s almost impossible to believe...
Hi! My name is Cornelius. I am an adult, who was raised by my parents through the things they learned in “How to Traumatize Your Children.” If you ask me, I think it’s a wonderful book. I think it’s a wonderful book filled with amazing techniques to help children...
You’re a nerd. You know it, your mom knows it, even your Great Aunt Bernice knows it. Friggin’ Bernice. Always gossiping. We really dislike people who gossip. Always poking into other’s people’s business, making random generalizations about who they are, how they act and what they like. Look, we’ve...
$19.99
Clocky is the original runaway alarm clock on wheels that helps you get up and go with some extra pep in your step! Clocky rolls! Clocky runs! You’ve got to catch Clocky to turn off your morning alarm! What a wonderful novelty to help you wake up with a...
$39.99
brewed 2 burn craft beer scented candle
I know. You’re asking yourself: “How do I truly let people know that I have committed to the craft beer lifestyle?” Extensive growler collection? Rare label cabinet? Beer gut? Amateur hour. Sure, you can start turning up to work hungover and reeking of IPA, occasionally calling in sick because...
Let’s face it, you look awesome with cool sunglasses on. But sometimes, it’s not worth all the hassle to drive all the way to the ancient ruins known as “The Mall” to find a pair, priced $100 over the price of the item from the manufacturer themselves on their...
$15.98
novelty ceramic mug
We might as well admit the elephant in the room: coffee makes you poop. Coffee is both a laxative and a diuretic, which is a fancy way of saying you’ll need to use the bathroom one way or another. A coffee mug shouldn’t shy away from this fact and...
$12.99
formula for unskrinking clothes
Have you ever tried to shrink an over-sized garment in the dryer and it came out looking like a sweater for a chihuahua? Or perhaps a favorite sweater ended up in there by mistake? We all mess up the wash every so often.  Or every day, but no judgment!...
$11.99
6 flavor assortment of odd sodas
Roll up to the party like, “ANYONE WANT A TASTE OF MY BACON SODA?” Utter such a phrase and the party guests will immediately turn into putty in your fingers. Mold them, dear friend. Mold them to love you. To appreciate you. To turn the party into the most...
$23.69
hangover cure drink
The party doesn’t stop until the hangover kicks in. Then you’re stuck at home all day trying to recover from what feels like death.  The last thing you remember was the pounding music, lights flashing everywhere, and people are raging.  Now all you know is there’s some dried up pizza in...
$35.99
cat scratch turntable
So let’s face it, the world of music has gone downhill since Avicii tragically left us. So who is going to take his place in this crazy world of EDM?  First, who is suiting of becoming the next great DJ of our time? Honestly, DJs are the laziest of the...
$30.27
gimmick rubber wine bottle stopper
Nothing reminds you that you’re no longer in college more than an unfinished bottle of wine. One of the first steps of adulthood is prioritizing your early morning meeting tomorrow over a second glass of Merlot. You might as well admit that wine makes you sleepy, grandma, and invest...
$13.97
people of walmart coloring book
The People of Walmart Adult Coloring Book is just the thing for that Zen soul-searcher who has tried everything. You’ve attempted to practice meditation, hour after hour of diligently coloring mandalas and then burning them, to remind you of the futility of labor and the importance of the present....
$10.79
coffee mug
How do you communicate to your loving boss and awesome fellow employees that you really shouldn’t be given any extra responsibility? With the World’s Okayest Employee Coffee Mug, that’s how! You’ve tried everything else to cultivate an air of mediocrity such as: Waltzing on into work late every other...
$12.99
everyday etiquette how-to guide
Meet Dick (short for Richard). Richard is…well, he’s not one of those people you’d call your pal. Neither is he rich. Ironically, there really isn’t a better way to describe Mr. Richard than to apply the four-letter word his mama gave him at birth. It fits Mr. Richard well,...
$13.91
mini finger hand attachments for finger hands
You are human, and like most humans, you’ve got two hands and five fingers on each hand. We, humans, tend to take those meaty slap factories for granted, and all the marvelous things they can do. Just think if you had hands for your hands for your hands! What’s...
fur pet bed hot dog design
How do you add an accent piece to your living room that says both “I love hot dogs and my dog, but I’m also super fun and quirky?” The Hot Dog Pet Bed, that’s how! Quirky, but comfortable for your dog The marks of your lovely little furry children...
$19.50
dog coin holder
Do you want people to look at you and think, “Wow they have their corgi obsessed life completely together.” Don’t give them a reason to doubt that by adding this corgi butt coin purse to your collection. Take your Corgi obsession to a whole new level Throw that spare...
Retired Adults wearing gag gifts and laughing
Know someone who is about to retire and needs an awesome gift? Maybe they are ready to hang their ties up (or maybe even burn them all), then this is the list for you! We’ve collected some of the funniest retirement gifts on the internet, and you can get...
toys for days
Do You Have an Addiction? This is it. You’re really going to quit this time. You’ve hit rock bottom and it’s time for a change. You can’t pop strangers pimples without their permission anymore. You can’t ask them for permission wither, it’s too weird. It was definitely what ruined...
$19.99
roast beef sandwich bath
Ugh. The grind of the workweek. You’re up and at’ em every day, and you’re working your tail off for the man. By the time the end of the week arrives, it’s all about a little “you time.” Sit back, relax, enjoy a nice pallet of bacon soda pops...
$15.95
skull head log on fire
Do you feel like your friends aren’t sure how committed you are to the death metal? Are you afraid people think you are joking when you mention human sacrifice? Do you wish your neighbors knew just how much you don’t want them near your backyard fire extravaganza slash piercing...
$49.95
Dear Realistic Baby Doll (A Letter from a 3-year-old): This is a sincere letter of gratitude for all of the wonderful benefits you have provided me. As a three-year-old little girl, you may be surprised as to the limitations placed on me by life, at this point in time....
$139.99
wireless headset speakerphone cap
Don’t you hate it when you’re jibbing down the mountain on your board and all you have to listen to is the wind flying past your ears? Obviously, you can’t throw on some earphones unless you have some sort of crazy death wish. But with the Soundbot Bluetooth Beanie...
$16.99
The Instant Path to Enlightenment To quote the infinitely wise and enlightened Hugh Jackman, “I love making a fool out of myself. I made my living as a clown at kids’ parties for about three years.” Classic Hugh, am I right? He also said, “Meditation is all about the...
Waterproof seat protector for dogs
Dog lovers will do anything to make their pet’s lives more enjoyable. And for good reason. Dogs are arguably the only pure things left in the world, so we need to help them at all costs. A two-for-one benefit, this dog car seat cover protects your upholstery and your...
$19.99
Worried you might crash one day from using your phone while driving? Statistically, you should be. And legally, you shouldn’t be on your phone while driving. Jeez. But, you’re too cool for rules, so – an invention had to be made. Everyone hates the one jerk on their commute...
$14.99
chihuahua-in-duck-dog-muzzle
Dogs are pretty freaking cute, but do you know what makes any dog even more adorable? A Costume. One Which Turns Your Dog Into A Duck! Let’s go over some of the benefits you and your fluffy friend will enjoy: Your dog will be quacking with joy until you...
While we’re on the subject of you: You’ve been a little passive-aggressive lately, which is awesome, like me. Frankly, who doesn’t love passive-aggressive people? Life would be boring without you I guess. Don’t come right out and say what you’re feeling, EVER. Just dance around the topic like you’re...
MEET SARGE, HOST OF COOL HIT NEW VIDEO GAME, EXTREME CHORES! SARGE IS GOING TO WALK YOU THROUGH WHAT IT TAKES TO BE AN ABSOLUTE BUTTOCKS KICKER IN THE WORLD OF CHORE LIFE, WHERE IT’S A TAKE NO PRISONERS LIFESTYLE FOLLOWED BY A TEN KNUCKLE SHUFFLE OF JABS TO...
Let’s be real; fish are the easiest pet to take care of.  But sometimes, even throwing some food in their tank now and then can become a real hassle when you’re busy trying to take over the world.  Well, the robotic pet fish is the answer to your problem....
gentle deshedding tool
Pet grooming is arguably one of the worst parts about having a pet. Well, maybe just after picking up their feces. But it’s definitely up there. It’s expensive and time-consuming. With the grooming glove, it doesn’t have to be! Salon Style at Home Save money on expensive salon visits...
$13.86
Picture the first time you ever went to SeaWorld. Smell the saltwater emanating from what seems like everywhere. Think back to the sea lions performing for packed crowds – the water splashing around, the excitement from the audience. Remember that feeling you got in your gut that you can...
$11.99
hilarious card game
You probably think you’re the cock of the walk when you stroll into a party with your hilarious party games, don’t you? Well, bad news lil buck-a-roo: you have to kick it up a notch ASAP. We’re talking, taking it to the next level, where the next level is...
$33.47
the complaint grenade ensures no more complaints!
What Do You Do With Complaints? As the wise and wonderfully talented LL Cool J once remarked in the 1992 hit song “Mama Said Knock You Out,”: “Explosions are overpowering, and over the competition, I’m towering.” Imagine that — what a line. And you could live that life every...
$17.99
smoking-dry-ice-drink-stirrer-sticks
Take your upcoming party to the next level. Turn your cocktails into a specialty concoction with these dry ice drink stirrers.  Whether you use it for an unforgettable Instagram or making a drink to capture the eye of an onlooker,  you’re sure to impress with these. These stirring sticks are designed to...
$13.95
Flipped license plate holder
What’s better than one license plate? TWO License Plates! Maybe you already have 2 separate license plates, and you’re tired of constantly switching them like a peasant? Want to play a spy? Trying to do impress your friends? Maybe you just like just to be prepared? Want to practice...
$33.90
“Show me a person who does not like potato chips, and I will show you a loser.” – Former President Grover Cleveland OK – so there’s no actual, physical or verbal proof that the former President of the United States actually uttered those words. But can you imagine if...
There’s no way you’re still talking on your phone like it’s 2003, are you? If you are, there is very little hope for you. Frankly, why not just go all out and treat your phone usage like it’s 1897. Carry around an old wooden wall clock with a handset...
Oh, Look Who It Is: Johnny Money Bags! Look at you, walking around like you’re some sort of financial wizard with those money bags. You think there’s no end to the riches you can amass, right?  The whole world is your oyster. And it’s a damn tasty oyster. Filled...
folding pocket knife
This Folding Pocket Samurai Knife is just the thing for the business samurai on the go. In today’s hustle and bustle world, where the once noble samurai have been forced into second, even third, jobs, it can be tough for a samurai to uphold the ancient code of honor...
$19.99
flash-card-set-with-slang-terms
So here’s the tea. The youth have created a language of their own these days, and let’s be real; it’s hard to keep up.  The slang flash card set by Knock Knock makes decoding what the millennials and generation z are trying to say to you.  In this 50 card...
$10.35
car exhaust whistle prank
In the Autumn of 1916, a man named Barnaby J. Minkles stumbled upon a prank so lively, so wonderful and so outrageous, he was regarded as one of the foremost prank masters of the twentieth century. Minkles worked long hours on the assembly line as a linesman for the...
PASADENA, CALIFORNIA: July 2019 Pasadena Times Headline: BABY IN A TORTILLA BLANKET BURRITO PHOTOSHOOT CAUSES UPROAR WITH LOCAL COMMUNITY The reason? What a disaster. Who was the creator who would ever think you should put a baby in an actual burrito? And where in the world would they find...
$15.99
best christmas gifts
Are you tired of giving the same old boring Christmas gift that goes unappreciated? Do you want to be the star of gift-giving this holiday season? It can be hard to figure out what to get for Christmas; what is on-trend? Will it be useful? More importantly, will they...
Everyone knows that distracted driving is the best type of driving! If you added up all of the time you spent mindlessly driving, looking at stop signs, pedestrians, red lights, oncoming traffic, and all the other nonsense that being behind the wheel forces you to look at, you’d have...
woman with inhaler wall sticker
Grandmas are the legendary MVPs of any family.  They are an essential factor in any household.  They can cook, they can clean, they work as an in-house counselor and mediator of any fight that breaks out.  Sometimes even a personal hitman if their cane is nearby.  Hands down, grandmas...
$27.15
Your robotic lawn mower’s name is ROB; he is the perfect addition to your home and garden power tool needs. ROB likes to cut your grass by himself; no human interaction is needed. Humans are no longer required. ROB will take over; his sharp blades have a fetish for...
You’re a Boss. A Boss With a Notepad. Maybe not the sort of boss Seth Rogan is in this video… Maybe not even the type of boss who dictates to an entire office of subordinates that they need to tie your shoes, groom your hair, and file your nails....
fun air gun toy
Mr. Zooka was the creator of one of the most ingenious contraptions ever made. The item he fashioned was able to take pure air, gather it all up into an invisible mass – and shoot that air back into the earth with a fantastic amount of energy behind it.
$19.50
rolling with the homies
Watch Your Worries go up in Smoke Need a new stash of rolling papers? Grab these money rolling papers the next time you want to impress your friends and smoke your financial worries away. Nothing says “I’m broke and my own worst enemy” like burning Benjamins you could be...
Although butts have been the asset of choice for what seems like centuries, lips have come in full force since Kylie Jenner debuted her new fillers a few years back and we haven’t been able to think about anything besides them since.  Everyone wants Plumper Lips! If you’ve been...
$19.99
smart-posture-trainer
I know your grandma is rolling over in her grave.  All those times she told you to sit up straight in your chair, and now you’re paying the price for not listening.  Boy, was that a mistake.  But honestly, no one likes a person with bad posture. Learn not to be such...
$169.91
novelty meat first-aid bandages
Tired of ordinary bandages? Unwilling to sacrifice your love of high-fat meats? Some small injuries can really sizzle, but you can fight fire with fire with a bacon bandage. Bacon bandages use the same principle of holding a frozen steak on your black eye without any of the clean-up....
This whale blanket is what every whale wants to see on the humans who pour millions of gallons of trash into their home every day. There’s no better way to watch blackfish then with the whale symbolically winning the battle of survival right on your couch. What better way...
$34.90
thats what she said button
MY NAME IS PRISON MIKE. THEY CALL ME PRISON MIKE BECAUSE I’VE BEEN IN PRISON. AND MY NAME IS MIKE. You think it’s all fancy dances and handshakes in prison? Because let me tell you, buddy, it’s not. It’s not waking up leisurely at quarter past eight while a...
$15.95
Are you a big sports fan? Then you are probably well aware of the saying “seeing double” after a good parking lot tale-gate. You have downed a sufficient amount of beer and are having a great time with your buddies, but all the sudden you realize your seats are...
$35.99
Pillow fights first came into prominence in the royalty circle of Richard the Lionheart in 1189. Sure, you’re reading this like, “Yeah, dude, I know He was the son of Duke Robert of Normandy, also called ‘Robert the Devil’, and of Herlev (also known as Arlette), whose father, Fulbert,...
$19.99
Look at you, living in some sort of “regular” house like you’re some king or something. Oh, our apologies, your majesty! Apparently, you like living in a “neighborhood.” Apparently, you think you need a “basement.” How weak we are that we think you could get by in life without...
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